Vehicular Suicide
I feel like I am a safe driver. Neither too offensive or defensive. Atlanta was my venture into the world of high-volume traffic many years ago. Lots of people, lots of lanes, crappy commutes between the hours of 3:30 and 7:30pm. Now take I-75/85 Atlanta traffic and plop it down in the middle of buildings and concrete. Take away all but two of the lanes on either side. Insert 24-7 construction with lane closings. That is my commute.
And then there are the NJ drivers, who do not know the meaning of the word "merge". Who honk if you aren't ramming the gas pedal to the floor the second the light turns green. Who expect you to run every red light - and will most likely rear end you if you choose not to. Why would you stop at a *gasp* yellow light? No one else does. There are also those who are inherently blind to the "Lane ends. Merge left." signs- until their lane disappears and they try to remove all paint from the side of your car before you slam on the brakes and let them in. OR you can take the riskier route by speeding up and saying many prayers. Put on your signal to change lanes? Yeah right. Forget about anyone actually letting you in. Gone are the courtesy waves that I have seen everywhere else I've lived. It's a strange new highway altogether.
Construction is everywhere. Last night I was squeezed between a bus and an orange and white barrel so closely that I had already written off my left side mirror. I was surprised to see it still there and undamaged when I unclenched my fingers from the steering wheel. Forget the coffee. I just had six shots of espresso. New Jersey drivers are expected to know the streets already, or have GPS installed in your vehicle. Because as I previously mentioned (angrily...don't blog angry), there are no signs. And if someone gives you directions to a destination less than a mile away, insisting that it's close by and easy to find... it will take you thirty minutes to navigate construction detours and one-way streets. Nothing is simple or self-explanatory here. Get used to it.
I am beginning to think nothing of how nonchalantly I am swerving into oncoming lanes to avoid a car door that's been flung open with reckless abandon. Or how boldly I am asserting myself when I. Need. To. Get. Over, You. A-hole. Or having to cut someone off to avoid a double-parked car. Which, by the way, I've also never been witness to until now. It's no wonder we have the highest car insurance rates in the country!
That reminds me: Tim's roommate went to Japan this summer and came back amazed by the complete and utter lack of driving rules! At a so-called four-way stop in this lovely country, cars whiz through, in, and around each other in dizzying patterns without a care in the world.
So since when did New Jersey become Sapporo? Probably long before I got here.
And then there are the NJ drivers, who do not know the meaning of the word "merge". Who honk if you aren't ramming the gas pedal to the floor the second the light turns green. Who expect you to run every red light - and will most likely rear end you if you choose not to. Why would you stop at a *gasp* yellow light? No one else does. There are also those who are inherently blind to the "Lane ends. Merge left." signs- until their lane disappears and they try to remove all paint from the side of your car before you slam on the brakes and let them in. OR you can take the riskier route by speeding up and saying many prayers. Put on your signal to change lanes? Yeah right. Forget about anyone actually letting you in. Gone are the courtesy waves that I have seen everywhere else I've lived. It's a strange new highway altogether.
Construction is everywhere. Last night I was squeezed between a bus and an orange and white barrel so closely that I had already written off my left side mirror. I was surprised to see it still there and undamaged when I unclenched my fingers from the steering wheel. Forget the coffee. I just had six shots of espresso. New Jersey drivers are expected to know the streets already, or have GPS installed in your vehicle. Because as I previously mentioned (angrily...don't blog angry), there are no signs. And if someone gives you directions to a destination less than a mile away, insisting that it's close by and easy to find... it will take you thirty minutes to navigate construction detours and one-way streets. Nothing is simple or self-explanatory here. Get used to it.
I am beginning to think nothing of how nonchalantly I am swerving into oncoming lanes to avoid a car door that's been flung open with reckless abandon. Or how boldly I am asserting myself when I. Need. To. Get. Over, You. A-hole. Or having to cut someone off to avoid a double-parked car. Which, by the way, I've also never been witness to until now. It's no wonder we have the highest car insurance rates in the country!
That reminds me: Tim's roommate went to Japan this summer and came back amazed by the complete and utter lack of driving rules! At a so-called four-way stop in this lovely country, cars whiz through, in, and around each other in dizzying patterns without a care in the world.
So since when did New Jersey become Sapporo? Probably long before I got here.
posted by Oob at 8:12 PM
3 Comments:
"Courtesy waves"? HA! Welcome to the other side of the Mason-Dixon, m'dear. Good luck, and don't die. Dying is not recommended.
Sounds like Baltimore. Driving on I-695 was like taking on the Autobahn. I swear I wasn't a bitch until I had to learn to drive up north. ^_^
Oh... big traffic city. I miss that! We're back from Europe... and I have been having trouble posting on your blog and your brother's... I know the whole beta thing, but still, I figured it wouldn't be that much different!
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